Grace #2

 

I joined an introvert Facebook page the other day. I never thought of myself as an introvert, but the more I read all the memes and comments, the more I have self-diagnosed that I am.  One of the glaringly obvious signs (apparently) is the inability to endure small talk.

I say inability, but what we’re really talking about is an inherent desire not to have to engage in talk about things that hold no interest for us. I hate small talk  (passionately), yet in my disdain I realise as I type this, it also becomes a little narcissistic.

A lot about not offering grace and kindness and less about my newly-labeled personality trait.

My friends husband finds the inner workings of a washing machine party-worthy conversation, does this make him the ‘most mind- numbingly boring person in the world’ (my words to hubby)? Or does it make him simply different to me? Someone whose thoughts, feelings and personality contribute to the workings of this world just as much mine do?

That’s obviously not what my gut feeling is when I critique him. At my core it is clear I don’t believe he’s as smart, interesting or valuable to the makeup of this world as I am. Harsh reality, right? I mean I wouldn’t have said that if someone asked me, but by my actions and reactions that’s what I am portraying.

Am I an introvert, or am I a narcissist who has little time or concern for those whose personality and interests differ from my own?

Sure it’s nice to have a label. It’s nice to be able to deflect any responsibility for looking deep within ourselves to inspire change, but it’s not real and it allows us to continue in our pathway of a lack of grace. Shame on us. In this me world we are living in, it seems that we label everything. Everything has a name, a cause, a pill to help you deal with your problem, to excuse your poor behaviour.

Perhaps it should be a little less about me and a little more about we.  We being the bigger picture of not caring so much about our feelings in the moment, but contributing to the greater good of kindness, love and grace in this self-indulgent world.

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Comments

  1. Very good perspective. Although we can examine ourselves as being introverts or extroverts or whatever -vert you want to be, that doesn’t mean that you should just 100% accept it and not try to grow and overcome your weaknesses. It’s a delicate situation, one that I’m trying to approach in the best way possible with my own blog (lovethyintrovert.com). Yes we should love and embrace ourselves and not try to make ourselves be someone that we are not. HOWEVER, we should also recognize our weaknesses and try to grow and strengthen them instead of yielding so willingly to them or make it into a crutch.

    • I love this comment! You’re totally right. There does have to be a healthy balance between acceptance of others and kindness, and acceptance of ourselves and understanding our own limits to keep ourselves healthy and at peace. Thank you for your valuable comment!

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